"A woman's poem"

A Woman's Poem

He didn't like the casserole
And he didn't like my cake.
He said my biscuits were too hard...
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn't perk the coffee right
He didn't like the stew,
I didn't mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and smacked the shit out of him...
Like his mother used to do.

Love it!

Sounds like a logical solution in that situation.

Thats AWESOME

Im glad to see that we are pro domestic violence.

jessks75 wrote:

Thats AWESOME

Yes, yes it is!!!

I guess he had that coming to him...

A man's Poem

She didn't like the casserole
And She didn't like my cake.
She said my biscuits were too hard...
Not like her mother used to make.
I didn't perk the coffee right
She didn't like the stew,
I didn't mend her socks
The way her mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and smacked the shit out of her...
Like her mother used to do.

mikecc wrote:

Im glad to see that we are pro domestic violence.

But it's only politically correct if it's women beating on men. It's called Oprahcision (removal of testicles)

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN
Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa,
Half discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful!
Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe,
Well developed and open to trade, especially for someone with cash.
Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain,
Very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.
Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece,
Gently aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit.
Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain,
With a glorious and all conquering past.
Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel,
Has been through war and doesn't make the same mistakes twice;
Takes care of business.
Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada,
Self-preserving but open to meeting new people.
After 70, she becomes like Tibet,
Wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages ...
Only those with an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge visit there.
THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN
Between 1 and 70, a man is like Iran
,
Ruled by nuts...

Quote :

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa,
Half discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful!

Nowdays her roads have usually been well traveled by that age.

Quote :

Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe,
Well developed and open to trade, especially for someone with cash.

Can't argue with that.

Quote :

Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain,
Very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.

Sometimes this is true.

Quote :

Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece,
Gently aging but still a warm and desirable place to visit.

If she's lucky.

Quote :

Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain,
With a glorious and all conquering past.

If she's real lucky.

Quote :

Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel,
Has been through war and doesn't make the same mistakes twice; Takes care of business.

AKA Is getting old and doesn't want to get stuck with the same losers she picked throughout life.

Quote :

Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada,
Self-preserving but open to meeting new people.

Sometimes the vacuum seal isn't too good on her preserves by now.

Quote :

After 70, she becomes like Tibet,
Wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages ...
Only those with an adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge visit there.

She knows alot, but be wary of the possibility of a diaper.

Quote :

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN
Between 1 and 70, a man is like Iran
,
Ruled by nuts...

Oh now, not all women are nuts.

Darn it, I can't find it, but I like the one that tells the women between ages that says something along the lines of...between 20 and 30, always asking what are you thinking? Between 40 and 50, not caring what the hell you are thinking. At least I think that's the ages, can't remember for sure. It was a good one!

This reminds me of an old cartoon depicting the stages of "droop" in various body parts of men and women each 10 years they age. It was funny, but rather graphic though, so couldn't post it if I had it.

Ratzilla wrote:

This reminds me of an old cartoon depicting the stages of "droop" in various body parts of men and women each 10 years they age. It was funny, but rather graphic though, so couldn't post it if I had it.

I have a neat, funny string of cartoons about Santa and Christmas. But I don't want to post each damn image to Photoshop and then format the post with all of the images here. If you would like me to forward it to you, PM me your e-mail address. Maybe you have seen it, maybe not, but it's a hoot.

Ratzilla wrote:

This reminds me of an old cartoon depicting the stages of "droop" in various body parts of men and women each 10 years they age. It was funny, but rather graphic though, so couldn't post it if I had it.

I think I received that via email a while back. Pretty funny, if it's the one I'm thinking of.